Lately, I’ve been struggling with this question that nags at the back of my mind - why won’t you leave me? I find myself questioning my worth and wondering what it is about me that keeps you holding on. Is it out of obligation, pity, or genuine care that you stick around? I want to understand, but I’m afraid of the answer.
Sometimes, it feels like I’m burdening you with my presence, like I’m not contributing anything of value. Yet, there you are, by my side, refusing to let go. I appreciate your loyalty, but it leaves me conflicted. Should I be grateful for your loyalty, or should I be concerned about
He made a decision to be with you, not the potential future child you may or may not have together. It’s audacious to believe you know better than him about what he wants for himself (but understandable given the circumstances)!
Have you undergone laparoscopy to diagnose endometriosis as a potential cause for your infertility based on your symptoms? It seems likely.
You are sabotaging yourself because of past pain. Your love for this man has inspired you to want children, showing a strong connection. Don’t rush into any decisions due to infertility struggles. You deserve love and many adventures together. Perhaps you’ll move to another country in the future. Sending a big hug your way.
Your partner has chosen to stay with you because they believe that leaving you would not bring them greater happiness. Remember the vows they made to be with you through thick and thin, including in times of sickness. When someone truly loves you, they will always be there to support you, even if it may be difficult for them as well. It’s important to prioritize self-love and recognize your worth beyond your ability to conceive. Remember, it is not your fault, and it never has been.
I empathize with your situation and understand how difficult it is. My partner and I have also struggled with infertility. It’s been tough as everyone around us seems to be starting families while we can’t. I thought about letting him go so he could have a family, but we both want to stay together. We’re exploring different options like IVF and potentially egg donation. It might be worth considering seeking treatment in countries like Czech Republic or Greece. Taking a break for yourself and focusing on your well-being is important. If possible, consider talking to a therapist and taking time off work. It’s important to take care of yourself during this challenging time.
Please consider switching doctors. I understand that the German health system can be overwhelming, but don’t lose hope. It seems like you may have endometriosis, and I truly hope for the best for you.
I can relate to how you feel. The shared pain and overwhelming guilt are weighing heavily on me too. Despite my partner’s love and desire to stay, the guilt threatens to drive us apart. I’m filled with fear and sorry that you’re experiencing this struggle as well. I’ve gone through three unsuccessful rounds already. I pray that the new year will bring you some much-needed luck and clarity. Dealing with emotional pain is incredibly tough; it makes you feel trapped with no way out. With perseverance, we can hopefully find strategies to cope with it.
I can relate to your situation as I have been married and trying to conceive for nearly 15 years. Despite my fertility issues, my husband has been incredibly supportive. We are currently undergoing IVF after failed attempts. No matter the outcome, I am grateful to have a loving husband who chose me for who I am, not for the children I can give him. Remember that your worth is not determined by your ability to have children, and you deserve peace, love, and happiness.
I am sorry that you are going through this difficult situation. Your words do not sound weak, but rather reflect someone who has been enduring too much pain alone for too long. IVF can be harsh, especially when the care feels cold and dismissive. It is valid to consider stopping.
Regarding your partner, it seems like he is choosing to stay with you out of love, not obligation. It is his decision, and you are not wrong for allowing him to make it.
Just sharing this for your knowledge, not as advice: In France, IVF is free, but we chose to go to Spain for IVF with PGT because the care there was professional, humane, and respectful. They are considered one of the best in the world. Whatever you choose, you deserve dignity and peace.
I also live in Germany and understand what you’re going through with IVF. My experience has been a nightmare and I feel like just a number to them. The lack of empathy and limited options due to laws on donor/embryo adoption make it even harder. We tried adoption, foster care, and international adoption but all led to long waiting lists. It strained our marriage, with me even suggesting we separate so my husband could find someone who could give him children. Thankfully, he reassured me that we’re in this together. After surgeries and failed options, we decided on embryo adoption abroad within the EU to relieve some pressure. It’s not for everyone, but it’s important to prioritize mental health. We also focused on clean eating and relaxation, which has given us hope for our upcoming transfer.
If you’re ever in Berlin and interested in discussing IVF, feel free to reach out!
Have you considered using an egg donor and his sperm to have a biological child? It appears that there may be deeper issues in the relationship, such as a lack of desire to be married. There are options available to have a child related to him, but ultimately, it’s important to clarify what you truly desire.
You come across as a fantastic, passionate, caring, and considerate individual. It makes sense to me that he would choose you. If the issue of having children is important to him, perhaps you could consider using an egg donor from a Greek clinic, as they are known for their care and thoughtfulness. However, if that idea doesn’t excite you, that’s okay too. Perhaps his soul needs a life together with you just as you are. You might be underestimating yourself by thinking you’re not enough. Have you ever questioned where that belief comes from and what its origins are? It could be an opportunity for self-discovery. If you’re interested, I can provide more information about Greek clinics through a direct message.